Early one Saturday morning as I opened a devotional to jumpstart myself, I was taken back to one I had previously read and I was in awe by what I saw that my own hands had underlined around two weeks prior.
“But eventually, if we’re looking for fulfillment outside of God, we will end up disappointed. It is always frustrating to look for the right thing in the wrong place” – Lisa Bevere, Strong – Devotions to Live a Powerful and Passionate Life. ( click here for the devotional )
You ever get snatched by Jesus like that? Here’s the back story, I ended that particular week feeling way off center, anxious, physically ill but not sick, eating terribly, and pestered by nearly constant headaches. By Friday night I clearly knew I had strayed too far. My eyes had managed to shift focus to lots of other “priorities” during the week. I had filled every moment with things that were so important and pushed myself to rely on myself to get it all accomplished. Surely an empty tank will cause your car to stop moving. Disappointment can show up in many ways. In ourselves from our own inconsistency and lack, from expectations we’ve put on others (and they don’t deliver) you name it. Those things that take our time, that we are seeking fulfillment from, may not always be bad, but should they come first? Should you commit your days out first, or should you commit them up and in (up to the Lord and into your heart)?
I want to say that I fully engulf myself in reading the way I want to daily. The truth is I’m still working on that. I spend time daily with God, read / study at least a little something from my bible, pray – but I have to be honest, some of those moments are rushed and short which means I’m barely soaking things in at times. It’s fine to continue to work on something, to not be perfect. But it’s not fine to simply skim through and pass the buck on everything else in life.
You have to choose to do something different.
These days I quickly realize when I’m walking right into being disconnected from God. It’s like He shouts at me to “get back on the road” which I’m completely ok with! So here’s my point- where are you fixing your eyes and your heart day to day? What are you spending your time on. We often feel like we don’t have the time but the actual problem is we don’t take the time. We choose to fill it with other things only realizing that we’ve gone too far in the wrong direction (or no direction at all) because we made a choice to fix our eyes and our hearts someplace else.
So I’m speaking to myself here! Sometimes, as much as I think, I have the time, there is just never enough. Do I want to get to the end of my life (which could be at any moment) wishing I had spent more time in the meaningful than not? I don’t. I want to die empty. Having learned and walked in my purpose and poured it out everywhere there was an opportunity.
Psalm 121:1-2 says I lift my eyes up to the mountains – where does my help come from? My help comes from the Lord, the maker of Heaven and earth.
Society teaches us that we should be independent, self reliant, do it yourself people. Well, the world can’t be my teacher. It will always leave me disappointed. The one who can requires my eyes and my heart to be in a fixed position. Not a wandering gaze.
Here’s a short Prayer to guide you in keeping your eyes and heart fixed.
Prayer: Father, I thank you for eyes that see and a heart that feels when I begin to shift away from your feet. Thank you for your word (Psalm 121:1-2) that reminds me that you are my help. I am not self reliant, I am God reliant. I don’t need to do anything in my own way, just everything in your way. You are my source of strength and help. Remind me to constantly fix my eyes and heart up and in instead of outward towards other things for fulfillment. Amen
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